Healing Power of Forgiveness to Overcome the Guilt

By Krishan Gupta

”As we change our own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards us? We need not wait to see what others do.”
– Mahatma Gandhi.

All of us muddle our way through the world even when well-meaning people hurt each other. We invest ourselves in deep personal relationships and another’s disloyalty or betrayal opens up wounds that hurt. Not every slight sticks with us, but some old pains do not washout so easily; they remain like stubborn stains in the fabric of your memory.  Some people are lucky; they never hold a grudge; and do not remember old hurts.  But most of us find that the pain of the past keeps rolling through our memories and there is nothing we can do to stop the hurt, despite our best intentions.

But, if you cannot forgive when someone has hurt you, it will go deep enough to lodge in your memory and keep hurting you.

Older people experience relatively more positive emotions, less volatility, and better ability to accept negative events: which enable them to bounce back. Thinking positive can access positive emotions and you will emerge a better person if you are able to find those angles that allow you to see a thread of good even in dire circumstances. This struggle can inspire profound and lasting personal growth. Some people become compassionate toward the plight of others, move into new careers and remake their world views and personalities. Their relationships with others grow deeper, and they may seek stronger spiritual dimensions in their lives.

Fear can elicit two responses: forget everything and run or face everything and rise. Nothing can destroy a person but his own mindset. Even though we forgave ourselves and thought we had moved on, that guilt still resides somewhere in us because we never confess our guilt to the person we hurt and the only way out is to confess and be forgiven so that you may be healed. Our egos are like magnets, and resentments are attracted to them. When we forgive others there is a freedom where we are no longer shackled by our own anger. It moves us from our selfish illusions to a beautiful reality. Letting go of the fantasy that we can change the past can change us. Each time we forgive, it paves the way for the next time we need to forgive. The day you choose to forgive, is the day you choose to retain the power over yourself, your feelings and step closer to living by your decisions.

We are all born to be loving, kind human beings and as we grow, we all continue to need love to prosper. The more you heal the brokenness and the guilt, the better life will be on the other side. It may not be instant but don’t let guilt wreak havoc on your body, mind and soul; you will feel peace with forgiveness and it is worth the relief. By getting rid of the shame and condemnation that has rotted your mind, you can choose to move on and be set free.